La televison en anglais

[piiimouss3]

Bonjour j ai un petit sujet de redaction a faire en anglais

Voila le sujet : La televison

Donc j ai déjà commencer si vous pouvie me dire si j ai des fautes ou des idées a me proposer cela serait tres gentil et Merciii d avance.

En intro:

Television was created in 1926 by John Baird, a Scot.At the beginning, programs were broadcasted in black and white, and only richest persons could afford to buy one.
Wereas , nowadays every family has got a colour televison set at home.
Even, an amount of children has got a telly in their bedroom

[Carmen]

Bonjour, je crois qu'il y a une faute sur le mot "Wereas", c'est pas plûtot "Whereas" ? Autrement, j'en vois pas d'autres....

Tu pourrais aussi parler de l'évolution des programmes télé et du nombre de chaînes.....

Bonne chance.........

[piiimouss3]

A oui exacte ce n est pas wereas mais whereas merci

Donc ensuite pour mon 1er paragraphe j ai ajoutée:

First when I get back from school I'm sick into an armchair to whatch"figures and letters"on three presented by Bertrand Renard, occasionally i watch this game with my friends.Next I work.
After a while at 8 o'clock, i watch tv news, this is the programme the most watching.Then, there is the weather forecast(bulletin meteo).
Later, at 8.20 I watch"More beautiful the life".I look this serial everyday.
A moment later , i dinner while i watching the serial of the day, for example last night i have watching "prison break" the story revolves around a man who was sentenced to death for a crime he did not commit and his brother's elaborate plan to help himescape his death sentence .I love this thriller


I think tv is a window of the world so as to with telly the youngers can learn a lot of things
For example : Dora the explorer is designed to engage pre-schoolers in a play along adventure .Dora the Explorer teaches children basic Spanish words and phrases along with math and music skills and physical coordination. Children also learn with Dora how to observe situations and solve problems.Therefor chldren develop their critical sens and their knowledge
Moreover, (pour les plus grands>?) tv can informe about world's events thanks to tv news indeed tv news is the programme the most watching
for example:September 11 th more on less monopolized all the screens during several days


SI vous poiviez me dire les erreurs svp
Merci d avance

[Carmen]

Je crois qu'après "help him", il y a "to " qui joue le rôle de "pour" devant un verbe... Pour le reste, ça a l'air d'être bon.
Demandes quand même à quelqu'un d'autre, histoire d'être sûr...
Fais gaffe quand même de pas oublier des lettres en recopiant au propre...

Il fallait raconter ce que tu regardais aussi ?
Je pensais que c'est plutôt général....enfin tant mieux, ça fait des lignes en plus !!!

[piiimouss3]

oki merci beaucoup
Si quelqu un d'autre a des conseils :id:

[Carmen]

De rien ........ :zen: